I haven’t written for a few weeks because I’ve been insanely busy.
Consumed by situations more
complex than I could have imagined.
When I was herding Jethro’s flock
and stopped to see the burning bush that was not consumed, and heard a voice speaking
from within the fire – a voice that could not be ignored – demanding that I go to
Pharaoh in order to bring the Israelites out of Egypt, I was incredulous. How could
I stand up to Pharaoh? How could slaves escape Egypt? Nothing like that had
ever been done. The task was difficult but clear: I represented God and the
Israelites, the good ones. We faced off against wicked Pharaoh. Both sides were
stubborn. It took some time and Divine power was needed to tip the scale, but good
won out and we left. After God saved us in the terrifying moment at the Reed
Sea, I was sure that everything would now go smoothly until we reached the
Promised Land. I was wrong.
Our water and food ran out. The
miraculous solutions God provided were insufficient to remove slavery from the
minds and hearts of the people. I began to realize that there was a long way to
go. I hoped that the impressive revelation at Mount Sinai, the detailed laws for
an orderly life once we reach the land, and the grand team-building project,[1]
constructing the Tabernacle, would smooth the path. Again, I was disappointed.
 |
| The scene Moses preferred not to recount* |
Time flew, the people lost patience, lost faith, and...
No, I don't want to repeat the details. You can read them in the protocol.
I found myself caught between
God, who was furious with jealousy, and God’s own people. In God’s wrath, God
even threatened to destroy the people because they are so stiff-necked and
stubborn. Suddenly, I discovered how much I loved them, despite all their
shortcomings. I could not handle hearing those threats. So, "I grabbed the
Holy Blessed One, as a person grabs a friend by the garment would, and said: Sovereign
of the Universe, I will not let You be until You forgive and pardon them.”[3]
God did indeed calm down, and repented of the evil that God had planned to do
to the people (Exodus 32:14). A long process began, not only punishment and
repentance on the part of the people, but also a new formulation of God’s
attributes. The jealousy and demanding punishment highlighted at Sinai (20:5) were
now replaced with mercy, graciousness and long-suffering forgiveness (34:6).
Contrary to God’s initial understanding, God now forgave the people
specifically because of their stiff-necked stubbornness (34:9).[4]
Tomorrow, I will continue my
work judging the people. I hope that I will be able to follow God’s example,
and implement a fair judging process that understands what has brought the person
to this point, without eliminating accountability. Woe to a society that ignores
accountability, and woe to a society whose judges do not see the unique person
in front of them.
[1] Thank
you to Sally Ben-Moshe for that formulation, in the Hod veHadar parasha class.
[2] Psalm
90:4. Thanks to my study partner Reb Joni Brenner for pointing the relevance of
the gap between heavenly and earthly time in this situation.
[3] Bavli Berakhot 32a
with slight changes.
[4] As
pointed out by Rabbi Ronald Price, in Divrei Halev: Thoughts of Rabbi
Professor David Weiss Halivni on the Weekly Torah Portion;
cf. Rabbi Shai Held, “Before and After the
Flood: Or it All Depends on How You Look” in The Heart of Torah,
vol. 1.
*Philip De Vere, CC BY-SA 3.0 <https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0>, via Wikimedia Commons
